The Grace of Resilience

“Be utterly humble

And you shall hold to the foundation of peace.

Be at one with all these living things which, having arisen and flourished,

Return to the quiet whence they came,

Like a healthy growth of vegetation

Falling back upon the root.

Acceptance of this return to the root has been called ‘quietism….’”

 

(An excerpt from #16 from The Way of Life, according to Lao Tzu, translated by Witter Bynner, 1994)

 

I’ve been thinking a lot about what I want to share on this blog post and how to begin.  I recently returned from spending the month of September at a nursing home in Naperville, Illinois, caring for my 92-year-old Mother.  It’s hard to put into words what that experience entailed.

My Mom has always been filled with energy and she is one who loves meeting people and talking with them.  However, I was called back home at the end of August because my Mom’s illness had taken a turn for the worse; and the doctors felt she literally had only a few days left on this earth.

 

When I arrived, she was out of the hospital and in a rehabilitation center to rebuild her strength.  She was actually sitting outside of the center in a wheel chair waving at me.  I had so prepared myself to be ready to support her in her last moments on this earth.  Instead, she appeared to be fine, in good spirits and not ready to leave this plane yet!

While spending time at the rehabilitation center, as I’d walk down the halls to my Mom’s room, I couldn’t help but notice many aged people who were barely hanging onto life.  They appeared to be literally withering away.  Of course, there were people of younger generations who were healing from surgeries or illnesses, too; but they were experiencing more of a temporary situation as opposed to a terminal illness.  I couldn’t help but ponder the whole process of life.

As Lao Tzu stated in the quote above, healthy vegetation begins “falling back upon the root.”  I think of my little great-nieces and great-nephews, who are like little sprouts just beginning to grow, taking in the energy of the sun.  Later, as plants gain strength, they blossom – humans do the same when they mature and begin to create and build their lives.  Just as plants have to withstand the wind and rain and heat and cold, so do humans as they weather the storms of their lives.  Eventually, those little vibrant plants begin to wither away – they have served their purpose, and so do we as humans.

However, plants seem to accept each day as it comes – you don’t see a plant storming off in anger because it’s tired of being rained upon.  Also, plants don’t seem to fight the process of aging.  They accept their time here on earth and reach what Lao Tzu calls “quietism.”  I like that word.  I wondered if some of the elderly people were reaching a point of “quietism” – accepting their last days here and allowing the aging process to be present – no resistance, no anger, no fear, just acceptance.

Meanwhile, my Mom is now in a long-term care home so that she may have constant nursing care.  Her resilience amazed us – she has come back many times from being very close to death.  It is like the little “plant” in her keeps finding sustenance to keep growing instead of “falling back upon the root.”  Also, many people were praying for her health; no doubt God’s Healing Hands gave her strength to carry on.