In my last post, I spoke of my Dad, who was steeped in
integrity. I believe I was in my mid-30s when I realized how much it must have
taken him to uphold his integrity, his character. It made me admire and respect
him even more. It can be very easy to take the slippery slope down the wrong
path. I was very fortunate to have my Dad as my guidepost.
Recently, I heard David Brooks speak about his new book The Road to Character (2015). He talked
about how society puts a lot of emphasis on what he calls our resume
characteristics, as opposed to cultivating the characteristics of our soul. He
admits he’s always been focused on his resume characteristics but now wants to
work on his soul’s characteristics. I decided to pick up his book and learned
that he researched numerous people who started out in life on the wrong foot
but decided to redirect their path – these life vignettes run through his book
and make for an inspirational read.
Brooks informed the reader that you can Google word usage
over decades to determine the overall change in our language. For example, one
word that has risen sharply is “self,” which is not surprising and very
telling. Words related to economics and business have also risen; however,
words such as “community,” “share,” “united” and “common good” have shown a
sharp decline. Also on the decline is language related to morality, character
building, character conscience and virtue. Here are some interesting word statistics
which have all declined over the 20th century: Bravery –66 percent, Gratitude
–49 percent, Humbleness –52 percent and Kindness –56 percent.
Brooks feels we are “morally inarticulate.” I’m not sure
exactly what this says but I found it to be sad. I know we typically build
character when we’ve had a more difficult life, when we’ve had to humble
ourselves to regroup and take a new approach. I strongly believe that we are
here on this earth to “grow” our soul, which builds our love and compassion.
Everyone experiences good and bad times and we’re fortunate as a humanity that
we’re not all in bad times at the same time and that those not in bad times are
capable of compassion to help us through the difficult days.
Brooks shared a quote he received from Dave Jolly, a
Veterinarian, as a comment from a previous article he had written:
“Good, wise hearts are obtained through lifetimes of
diligent effort to dig deeply within and heal lifetimes of scars. What a wise
person teaches is the smallest part of what they give. The totality of their
life, of the way they go about it in the smallest details, is what gets
transmitted.”
The human body and mind is miraculous; for many years, I
watched scientists and engineers attempt to duplicate it. We may differentiate
each other by our names and faces but our character is fully ours alone and we
get to determine that. If for no other reason, out of respect for the
brilliancy of our human body and mind, let us cultivate our character to become
the best we can be.
There are a few small quotes I’d like to share that I
felt are worth repeating from Brooks’ material:
Don’t let the “deepest parts of yourself go unexplored
and unstructured;” Don’t “step into a self-satisfied moral mediocrity;” Be
careful not to “grade yourself on a forgiving curve;” Don’t let a “humiliating
gap open up between your actual and desired self;” “Shoot for something higher
than happiness;” “Become acutely aware of your own weaknesses;” Remember, we
have to “go down to go up – from the valley of humility to the heights of
character.”
