Tuesday, November 1, 2016

The Grace of Grit and Gratitude

When we decide to find gratitude for all that has taken place in our life, we come to realize just how interconnected we are. In her book, Harnessing Courage: Overcoming Adversity with Grit and Gratitude (2016), Laura Bratton expresses very personally the gratitude she feels for the many hearts, minds and hands who guided, assisted or prayed for her along a very difficult path from childhood to adulthood and the grit she attained along the way in order to muster through each day.

I met Laura when she was a Freshman at Arizona State University. My first impression of her was that she was an intelligent, independent and vibrant young woman. Laura and her Mom met with me to establish her needs for the semester – Laura was blind and I oversaw the Braille Lab. Later, Laura became a student worker in the Braille Lab where she proof-read Braille documents. For the duration of my experience with Laura, my first impression never wavered but I soon observed that this intelligent, independent and vibrant young woman was also tremendously courageous. What I didn’t know until I recently read her beautiful and endearing account of her life, was all the many, difficult steps she had taken to get to that day when we met.

Laura’s life changed drastically at the age of eight when it was determined she had an eye disease that would slowly carry her to blindness. From the very first pages of her book and throughout, Laura expresses her gratitude for her parents, grandparents, her brother, extended family members, friends, church members, etc., for the countless gifts of grace they provided for her. She certainly had and still has a wonderful support network. That’s where her gratitude comes in – the grit part of her experience is what she had to find within, but how?

Sometimes, until we can find the grit within, a member of our support network has to “hold the hope” for us when we are so overwhelmed or feeling hopeless. In Laura’s case, one person who provided that was her brother, Rob, who utilized his high school football analogies in order to support her as he told her: “We are going to drop back and punt.” Even as a young man, her brother was not going to allow her to quit! Additionally, Laura’s parents became loving advocates for her – they pressed on so that she could receive the same schooling as other students – in fact, their tremendous effort made an impactful ripple effect for students who came after Laura, who were also mainstreamed. But, Laura also found the grit within, which is an ongoing process as challenges arise. Her statement below is a testament to this:

“The energy it takes to resist and hold back from moving forward is much more exhausting and fear-inducing than actually choosing to embrace a situation. The paralyzing, fearful questions of doubt hold us back and prevent us from using our strengths and gifts. Incredible grit is required to move forward in new situations.”

Laura’s life changed continually as her sight diminished. Each time, she considered the change a “new normal.” She discussed how one can make the choice to “live into the new normal or remain in a constant place of depression and anxiety.” One helpful recommendation from her counselor that she utilized was to turn toward her emotions and acknowledge what she was feeling.

An important life lesson I learned from Laura in her account of her life was that she found it was better not to waste time on painful experiences as she moved forward into her new normal. Not that this was an easy task, even for her today, but one that provides energy for the new normal experiences – one of the many “tools of life” she shared in her amazing story.