Sunday, September 1, 2013

The Grace of Becoming "Unstuck"


A number of years ago, I worked in the field of behavioral health, supporting persons with a serious mental illness to get their life back on track.  I really enjoyed the experience and learned a lot about life.  What I found most often was that people were “stuck” – their illness had so changed their lives that they had forgotten what they used to do to enjoy life.

One example involved a woman in her mid-30s.  Her mental illness was due to tremendous abuse as a child, so she carried a very strong bravado – a football player ready for her next tackle!  Her mantra was like Clint Eastwood’s “Go Ahead – Make my Day!”  Unfortunately, there was no one she could trust, so she led a very solitary life of fear.  Each day, she dug in her heels a little deeper and would not budge from her stance.  What I learned when she got the courage to become “unstuck,” was that it was like taking a huge leap; however, the huge leap was all in her mind.  This required taking a step away from her ego to take a step toward trust; once there, she learned that taking this huge step was not like crossing a chasm after all, it was more like stepping over a thread.

As in her case, fear is what often causes us to become “stuck.”  Perhaps we’ve experienced a bad relationship, or we were abused as a child or we’ve gone through abandonment or some type of loss during life.  Often, we hang onto what we think is a “life vest” for survival; however, unfortunately, this is only an illusion, created by our mind to help us to feel safe.

Blame is another way to become “stuck.”  There is a great statement related to this: “The day you stop blaming is the day you take responsibility for your life.”  Often we blame someone in our life for why our life didn’t turn out as we had hoped or we feel we’re “stuck” in our current situation because of what we experienced in life.  However, as long as we stay in blame, we give our power over to that person who hurt us or abused us or left us.  Herein lies the being “stuck” part.  Once again, we dig in our heels a little deeper to strengthen our stance.

Our ego wants us to stay in fear because it has “control” over us; however, this brings about a lot of suffering.  Often the first step to getting “unstuck” is to accept the situation exactly as it is.  This is a way to honor our life and who we are.  From an “accepting” standpoint, we’re no longer “resisting,” which then opens the door to seeing things in a different light.  This releases the struggle that’s around the issue or the way of life and allows Healing Light to come in.

God has given us a tremendous gift – our life – it is amazing just how intricate it is.  I think it’s important to take responsibility to unload all the hurts and the pain, to let go and to allow only the positive juices to flow.  By so doing, we honor our life, we then become more open and gain more confidence in extending love to others, which is the gift that God wants us to share here on earth.

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